In this episode, we sit down to talk about the practical challenge of creating a robust sense of community in our local churches.
The American church is getting drawn into a culture that celebrates celebrity and entertainment and entertainment-type gatherings… a lot of [pastors] fall into the trap of trying to attract customers rather than building community…
Most pastors are struggling with building small groups and community inside their churches, no matter the size… we’re facing some headwinds…
The first headwind is that we’re becoming very tribal… to find places where you belong is challenging if you don’t believe like everyone else… it’s taken over so much that pastors are afraid to disagree even with their own congregation…
The second headwind is that we’re all transplants… we don’t live around family any more… America has become very mobile…
The third headwind is that we’re busy… and the fourth headwind is that we’re hurt… many of us bring pain from past church relationships with us into our new church and have made inner vows that we’re not going to get close to church people anymore…
One of the things we need to do is just greet people well… BE NICE… we work really hard at greeting people… the initial greeting can break down walls…
We also need to help people find friends and be known in the church… people often don’t get what they need in the church because they don’t know who to ask… they need someone that they can talk to if they are struggling…
Finally, we need to help people find mentors… the generational gap in our culture is growing… one of the beautiful things that we’re working at is creating intergenerational connections…
Every gathering needs to be relational… create space for “linger” moments where people can connect… create fuel for ongoing conversations… and then invite and train people to lead…
Leading for community requires margin and space within your calendar to be relational… the moments sneak up on you… and if your calendar is so full that you can’t be interrupted, then you’re too busy as a leader…
At the end of the day we have to remember that we are not the administrators of a large program… we’re entering into life with people… we’re trying to be a community that is running at the purposes of God…
This is not easy… it has to be intentional, and it can’t be programmed… friendly, relational pastors produce friendly, relational churches…